Must Love Dogs (*)

It's been a while since I've really felt pained in a movie theater before. There are so many annoying, cliche-ridden moments in this cheap, lazy romantic comedy that one starts to lose count. This is the kind of movie that suburban middle-aged women choose as their one movie to see in a theater for the year. They were certainly the audience I was with. Even more saddening, these women know everything that's going to happen. They laugh beforehand when they predict lines and situations outloud, and then laugh again when it actually happens on screen. It's as if they enjoy being fed exactly what they expect. Not me. I hate, hate much of this movie. Precocious kids abound, as do hideous movie moments like a Partridge Family sing-along, and a soundtrack that hits home every thematic point. For example, when Diane Lane finds herself home alone eating ice cream, "Hey there, Lonely Girl" starts to play. How very subtle indeed. Nevertheless, John Cusack and Diane Lane do make an engaging screen couple. When they are both on screen together, the movie actually works. So, in a way, I guess you can say it does what it's supposed to. But still. Painful.